November 25th

IT'S BABY DAY! My sister was due three days ago but it looks like today's the day! I am so excited to be an aunt to another beautiful little boy. Here's praying everything goes smoothly!  (Rest assured... baby pictures will be a comin' any day now!)

November 24th: Kid Thanksgiving

They didn't finish and they have some interesting handwriting but...

November 17th

I may have accidentally convinced my third graders that I am retiring during Thanksgiving break and not returning. They keep bringing me stuff to try to bribe me not to leave. Or in other words to prove their love to me. Yesterday I got a potted plant. Today I got a vase of flowers and…

Miss R. and the Bionic Eye

I had just taken my students down the hall to the cafeteria and sneaked back into my room. The lights were mostly off so as not to alert anyone to my presence, and I sat behind a file cabinet, finally checking my phone, drinking some water, eating my lunch, and enjoying the comparative silence. Then…

Teething Menace

I sometimes joke with my sister that being around her kid has convinced me to have none of my own. About 50% of the time that joke is a joke, and the rest of the time it's not. My nephew is the cutest kid. He's a little sweetheart with a contagious laugh and a set…

Respect is Dead

Respect is a learned behavior. At least in our day and age, respect is not found intrinsically, but rather in what one has been taught to respect. This applies to everything, from respect of parents, teachers, family, friends, and (perhaps most importantly) self. It also includes respect of laws, hierarchies, customs, traditions, motivations, goals, lifestyles,…

“I don’t want eyelashes!”

Today isn't even half over and my second graders have made me laugh more than usual. In our science class we've reached the unit on the body and its systems and how to keep it healthy. We've been talking a lot about cells, and also about the digestive system. Both of these discussions led to…

God Bless America…

You know you live in the 'land of the free and the home of the brave' when all of your second grade students think that The Star Spangled Banner, our national anthem, is a Christmas carol, and request it to be played for the end of the year party because, as they say, it's the best…

Kid Shit

Miss Rataaaaajczak, somebody peed on the carpet! Miss Ratajczak, how do you spell a... A what? A... like a dog, or a cat. A? ...you spell it... 'a'. That's it. That's it? That's it, I swear. How about this, Miss Ratajczak - if I stop picking my nose and eating it you can give me…

Dog Names…

My father says that if you want a really good name for a dog, you should find something with as few syllables as possible, to make repeated calling of the name less tedious, and that it should be composed of the sort of sounds which carry farthest and loudest when screamed. My father wants to have a…