Worries

The things we spend our lives worrying about probably say a lot about us. It says where our priorities are. It says who we love. It says what we want. It says what we’re most afraid of. It says everything.

I worry about my family and how little they understand each other. I don’t mean little misunderstandings – I mean how we’re all different aliens from different planets. Warring planets. Nobody in our lives has caused us more grief and heartache than each other. Is that the case in all families? Perhaps. I don’t know. But I worry about it endlessly while I watch my people tear each other apart. Does it end?

I worry about money. Not because I want a lot of it for myself, but because I have more people to look after than just myself. And taking care of your people is everything.

I worry about the future, but not because I think I’m supposed to know my path before I come to it. I worry about it because I want to do all the good that I can with the time I have. I want to find and develop the skills I need so that I can spend my whole life serving others. And maybe making up for past mistakes while I’m at it.

I worry about my soul and my sanity. I worry about leaving a positive footprint instead of a negative one. I worry about whether I bring more smiles or more tears into the world. I worry about how much I worry.

I lose a lot of sleep.

But I don’t worry that much. Worrying doesn’t solve a damn thing. What I worry about may say a lot about who I am as a person, but it still gets me nowhere.

So for tonight, I’m leaving my worries right here. I’m going to go out for something to eat, and then I’m taking myself to a movie. And I will not worry.