Yes, apathy is exhausting. Why? I think it’s because whether its conscious or not, it takes a lot of energy to not care. Not caring is inhuman. That may not be what you want to hear when you’re so tired of things not working out that you’ve hit apathy. But it’s true. It is in human nature to care and be concerned and interested and invested.
Apathy is exhausting because it does not come naturally to us. No one blames you when the malaise occasionally creeps in and your scattered thoughts won’t come together for a day or two. But it is in man’s nature to pull himself up, to find the light, to pursue that which will help him and help others. It is only when we forsake this part of our nature and bury this inclination that we are truly in trouble. When you allow yourself to sink too far into apathy, it only gets harder to come back.
If apathy is exhausting you, tell yourself that this is the last day of it. Tell yourself with confidence and surety that this is the last day, and after today you will not be apathetic. You will remind yourself of what you care about and what you are interested in and what is good for you, and you will pursue that. Go to bed that night calm because you know that tomorrow will be okay. In the morning, wake up new. Shower off the remnants of not-caring. Face forward in your life.
When you’ve reminded yourself of what motivates you, and you’ve set goals to follow, it will be easier. It doesn’t work if you tell yourself I could or I might or I should. It works when you tell yourself I will. Maybe the ‘power of positive thinking’ has been all talked out, so don’t talk about it. Just live it. Tell yourself that your positive goals are going to happen; if they work out then you’ve succeeded, if they don’t then be mature enough to remember that you were doing this in order to be positive, and that as a positive person, more opportunities are in your path.
Don’t let apathy waste your life. That’s the worst sort of waste. If you’re convinced you’re going to waste your life anyway, it might as well be ‘wasted’ in an attempt to do something worthy.