in love

As I was meaninglessly trolling the internet today, I came across this gem:

loveReading it, I found I disagreed with more than I agreed with. “I hope you fall in love with someone who always texts back and never lets you fall asleep thinking you’re unwanted.” Yes, I’d like to fall in love with someone who loves me enough to not let me feel unwanted, but I don’t want him to think he can do that by never forgetting to text me back. Love isn’t answered texts. How about “I hope you fall in love with  someone who knows you don’t care about his texts and understands you’d rather hear him say goodnight in person, even if that’s the only thing he’s said to you all day”?

“I hope you fall in love with someone who holds your hand during the scary parts of horror movies.” I’d rather fall in love with someone who grabs my shoulders in the dark in the most suspenseful part of the horror movie so that I scream and jump and miss the next five minutes cause I’m punching him in the shoulder and then we have to rewind the movie which is still just as terrifying, just to see what actually happened.

“…with someone who burns cookies with you when you’re too busy dancing around the kitchen”? No. We can dance around the kitchen with joy at the not-burnt peanut butter cookies and milk that we’re cheekily eating together at 2am. That sounds a lot more satisfying.

“Someone who sees galaxies in your eyes and hears music in your heartbeats” isn’t for me either. I want someone who will drag me outside with a blanket to look at the galaxies in the skies, and who lets me write words to the music he composes when he can’t sleep. That’s a lot more real. That’s a lot less about me. That’s the way I’d like it.

“Someone who tickles you and makes you smile…” well, I can’t say no to that, but I’d like it just as well if he made me smile by making fun of me and pushing my buttons and finding my limits with me and adventuring in life together. It may be the small things that count most, but in the grand scheme of things, it’s all small things.

I don’t want to fall in love with the way somebody makes me feel, especially not how they make me feel about myself. Being in love with an ideal is fatal. I want to love something real, something that doesn’t make excuses or try to be more than it is.

Obviously this is a personal preference, but what is a fact is that people are so afraid of (or just distant from) reality that when they meet someone they’ve a chance of caring about, they turn themselves inside out trying to fit a type or make an impression that they get lost. Without real people you can’t have a real relationship, so essentially it’s doomed from the start. Relax. Breathe. Forget the facade and have some fun. That’s all there is to it.

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